Caleb will be in my arms by this time next year (and repeat)
OK i just realized my mother knows NOTHING about the adoption. She has not asked ONE question. She does not know how old Caleb will be, what agency we are using, if we are traveling and how long the wait will be. How can she judge without knowing anything and how can i let someone like that bother me so much? When someone tells you they are pregnant you dont tell them "dont get your hopes up you could miscarry" and yet women miscarry everyday no people say "congrats" and anyone who says any different is rude or just a downer and you cant let people like that bring you down even if it is family. So next time i am just going to say "OK" and repeat over and over in my mind Caleb will be here in my arms by this time next year.. Caleb will be here in my arms by this time next year.. Caleb will be here in my arms by this time next year...
-C
posted by S&C @ 10:35 PM
3 Comments:
Keep up your spirits and don't verbalize or listen to anything negative; only positive. My Mother used to tell us that the devil can only hear what we say, not what we think so we had to make sure that we only spoke the positive thoughts and kept the negative ones to ourselves.
Also, I know it's hard, but you will deal with this a lot better if you assume that your mother has positive intent. Less stress!!
You know, your blog is the first one I check each morning.
C,
I am sorry that your mom is manipulating your emotions (again) in a passive-aggressive attempt to justify her reluctance to acceptance. It seems that it's one step forward two steps back with that relationship dosen't it? It is perfectly understandable that you would want your MOTHER, of all people, to build you up emotionally during this time; this step being the biggest you'll ever make. But, along with your repeated mantra, try to keep in mind all that you have accomplished and been through in your life. You've made your way in a different state, away from family; you've established your career; you've made a life with a great gal (hey S!)and bought a home together. Awesome stuff that was not supported by her. It IS sad that you can't turn to her for a warm heart, and it's human instinct to keep trying, but I agree with the gal who commented on the last post. Your best defense is to let it go. Try as much as you can to be zen about it, breathe deeply (when you want to smack her upside the head), and smile serenly. Sometimes you can't prove anything to someone and the best that you can do is turn to the healthy (positive) people around you.
SJayne- Thanks :-) I like what your mom said. Makes since to me! Oh and don’t make me blush about the blog.. I am so glad you enjoy it!
Tami- I always love your posts! She is being passive-aggressive and I just don’t have time for it!!!!
-C
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