Patients? Ya right.

So we tracked our contract and it was delivered to the agency yesterday at 8AM. Let’s hope they sent the dossier out today so we should receive it by Tuesday or if we are thinking optimistic Monday. Maybe just maybe that will give us enough time to bust it out in a week. I think it takes most people a month to fill it out so if we are running around like crazy eat, sleep and breathing the dossier maybe we can. Wouldn’t it be awesome if we were the first people in the referral waitlist although I am sure all the other families are thinking the same thing LOL. Adoption is all about hurry up and wait, maybe this is just much needed practice for that. The starter round if you will. I don’t know if you can tell but patients is not our strong point.
-C

Lions and Tigers and... Elephants?! OH MY!

We are dying to do the babies room. Sari sent me an email a couple days ago saying "what are you doing this weekend want to start the baby's room?" It feels way too early for that. Even though I have had the room picked out for a year. Even compared paint colors LOL. If we were prego we wouldn't start the room with 6 months left, why should adoption be any different? But then we look on the internet and I have to say 75% of adoptive families have their baby's room done even when they have more than 6 months left. So I think we will start after the dossier is finished probably November. I hope looking at an almost complete baby room everyday for 4 months or more doesn't drive me crazy!

1 out of 3 Ain't Bad!

So I just realized, well, ok, fine, Courtney just realized that we are 1/3 of the way done!

homestudy done, INS filing done? CHECK!

Just need to finish (start) the dossier then approve the referral!

We're still shooting for May, we can hope, and we got all of you guys crossing your fingers for us that everything goes smoothly and quickly!
Well, thats it for now, just needed to write the revelation lol

-S

Sent

Contract was overnighted this morning!
With adoption it’s never just a contract… It was a good 10 pages of stuff to fill out, pictures, proof that the baby will have insurance and of course a check. We crossed all the T and dotted all the I so we hope to have the dossier early next week! YAY!
-C

OMG!!!

We got the contract in the mail today!!!!
After 3 months on the waitlist we are going to finally start the dossier!!!
We are SO excited!
-C

The Emperor's New Clothes

Yesterday we asked the future grandma if she wanted to go thrift store shopping for clothes. I think it really got her more excited. Each store we went to, she seemed more and more enthusiastic "omg, this is so cute!" or "you definitly have to get this!" Can you believe we only spent around $15!! We got some clothes that are way too big (like the jean jacket) but we figured great for next year. So without further ado, here are the spoils

Cribs, tools, sweat.... and its still not up....

So we got a collapsable crib last night. Its about ½ the size of a regular crib. It will be nice to put in our bedroom, take to grandmas that kind of thing. The box it came in is twice the size of the crib when collapsed so we figured put it together and stick it under the bed. OMG we worked on it for an hour and got maybe half of it up. At one point we were yelling at each other and sweat was dripping off Sari's nose (in October I might add so not that hot) why do companies do this to us?? Is it to make more money because I get so mad I take to pushing the screw in so hard I strip it? Does the screw company need that extra couple cents coming their way? And why do I need 3 different tools to get it up? So any parents-to-be out there, start putting your crib together now because you are going to have to re-order the extra parts you threw out the window.

-C

FBI… Boring

We both got our fingerprints this morning for the I600A at the FBI/Immigration place. How boring! Surprisingly fast so that’s good. I guess one more thing to cross off the adoption list. It was nice to actually do something again. I am getting way too antsy for the dossier. Bring on the paperwork!
-C

HOLY LAB IN COSTUME BATDOG!

Well, its official, we need a child... look what we did to our poor dog yesterday LOL. She hated every minute of it but we made a deal, if she just put it on so I could get the picture I wouldn't make her wear it Trick or Treating. So there you have it.

ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne ne BATDOGGGGGGG

A small glitch

So we have our first setback. Not even sure if it’s a setback hopefully it will just be an inconvenience.
Homeland security I600A women called this morning they don’t have my birth certificate. They are the last people we want to be missing paperwork it already takes months to get approval from them (and yes I said months with a s on the end) So Sari is the only one with the appointment at the FBI office tomorrow for fingerprinting. The women at the homeland security office said if we fax my birth certificate today that she would try to get me in...


UPDATE: Success! I just got a fax with my fingerprint appt for tomorrow, and they received a copy of my birth certificate! All is still on track *phew!*

-C

Talkin' to the Agency

So for the first time the agency called us first. Folks we are moving up in the world of adoption!!

They approved our homestudy. This was the final step in the homestudy. We just had to make sure the neither agency nor Ethiopia needed something extra in it. Our agency also wanted to clarify a couple things about our homestudy make sure we understood that the family might be involved with the child till we pick him up and that we fully understood transracial adoption and were reading and researching it. The phone call and emails that followed went really well :)
-C

Cafepress... For The Win!

So I love cafepress.com. I have a shop on there and check out the shirt I made... here is the link to the picture below.

http://www.cafepress.com/scificafe.20454051

Finally baby crap in the house

The entire time we were trying to conceive we never bought baby stuff, I thought it would be too hard having it around the house. So FINALLY this week we started collecting stuff. Some hand me downs and a few things we bought. For the first time we went to babies r us and looked around “we are going to get this and going to register this” that kind of shopping. As time goes by this starts to feel more and more real, it’s strange and different to think we sign all these papers and get a baby out of it. It takes your brain time to understand that concept. Being given and buying baby stuff felt like a big leap into realizing we will get a baby soon. We now have 5 toys, 1 hat, 10 pieces of clothing and a baby book. Now I can hardly contain myself from starting the baby room!
-C

Only 4 months

OMG!!!!! I was reading yahoo groups which by the way I love. Look at this women’s timeline to adopt a baby boy through the same agency we are using!!!!


10/14/2004
Homestudy Sent


10/18/2004
Dossier Sent to Ethiopia


11/23/2004
Received Referral


11/29/2004
Accepted Referral


12/21/2004
Case to Ethiopian court


2/23/2005
U.S. Visa ( in Ethiopia)


I know there are no guarantees. Also this women’s adoption was in 2004/2005.

BUT…


If we were on the same timeline as her we could have our baby home in February or March instead of April or May!!! YAY!!!!!

-C

Passports

Just a little entry, nothing important just another step to cross off the list!

Today we are getting our passports! Well, to be honest we would have submitted the application to the post office two days ago but my dumbass forgot the birth certificates... duh... ok, no biggie, 2 days isnt a long time to wait. I do have one complaint, why why why is it almost double the price to get it expidited?? Anyway, thats it for now.


-S

Telling the big news

When telling people the big news of our adoption we thought we knew what to expect. Sari and I had talked about it “so and so is going to be so excited” “so and so might have a problem with the transracial thing” Sari and I had no idea how wrong we would be. I guess when telling people big news you just never know what to expect. The people we though would flip out where so laid back and the people we thought would be laid back got all excited. We have people from work or friend of a friend giving us little baby gifts or baby hand me downs and some of our closest friends and family have hardly said anything, I think a lot of it has to do with not believing. It’s not like being pregnant so a lot of people might have a hard time actually seeing it happening. Well I got news for ya’ll it is LOL. I know once the child gets here we will have a great support system from all our loved ones and I know it’s a little extreme to ask people to get excited about this as we are. It’s just hard when we want to share the biggest thing that’s happened to us ever! Well that might be a little extreme but you know what I mean LOL.
-C

DFCS Finally Comes Through!

After 33 days of waiting for county DFCS to check 3 boxes saying we do not have a record with them, it has finally happened!! *does a little dance* The fax with the 3 checked boxes has been received by the social worker, and now a complete homestudy draft has been emailed to the adoption agency for review and hopefully everything will be in order and an official one will be put in the mail today or tomorrow. I know we arent off the waitlist until the end of October, but I just feel so much better knowing the agency is ready to go with everything when the time comes. No loose ends to tie up :) BRING ON THE DOSSIER!

-S

Division of Family and Children Services

Division of Family and Children Services (DFCS) sucks!!!!
First our social worker has called and emailed them at least 10 times faxed the form we need them to check 4 times and hears nothing from them for weeks. So our social worker passed the ball to Sari. Oh my poor DP all she has done for the last 24hr is call them. Then today at 11AM she finally reached someone!! YAY! So now we just pray this brave DFCS women who actually answered her phone is going to do what she said she would and run our background check.
So for any of you our there adopting in Georgia. Send DFCS the background check form ASAP and may god be with you lol

-C

We're better off for all that we let in

Dust in our eyes our own boots kicked up
Heartsick we nursed along the way we picked up
You may not see it when it's sticking to your skin
But we're better off for all that we let in

Lost friends and loved ones much too young
So much promises and work left undone
When all that guards us is a single centerline
And the brutal crossing over when it's time

I don't know where it all begins
And I don't know where it all will end
We're better off for all that we let in

See those crosses on the side of the road
Tied with ribbons in the median
They make me grateful I can go this far
Lay me down and never wake me up again

Kat writes a poem and she sticks it on my truck
We don't believe in war and we don't believe in luck
The birds were calling to her what were they saying
As the gate blew open the tops of the trees were swaying

I don't know where it all begins
And I don't know where it all will end
We're better off for all that we let in







Ya’ll are going to have to bear with me. I am sure at the beginning of this post you all are going to be like what the hell does this have to do with adoption. It has a lot to do with OUR adoption I will get to that at the end.

As you see from my other post we used a known donor 4 times. What that means is we asked a friend for his sperm. Well it didn’t quit go like that cause I am always scared. First we paid an outrages amount of money to artificially inseminate with unknown donor sperm 3 times because I was scared that if we asked someone that one day he would come back and claim the child. We also made the donor who agreed to go through $700 worth of blood tests and sign an unknown donor agreement. After all that I was still scared the agreeing donor was going to come back and claim the child so I lied and told him that we used frozen unknown donor sperm in the same cycle as his. That way when the child was born he might think it wasn’t his.
All this I did because I was scared.
It is one of my biggest regrets and largest life lessons.
Without what we went through with our known donor I am 100% sure I would not be writing these blogs. I would be too scared that some crazed person would find this blog and hunt me down one day. Or that the Ethiopian government would have people searching the internet for gays who want to adopt in their country. Crazy I know!
What changed me so much is our donor died when I was 7 days past artificial insemination with his sperm. He went to bed and never woke up again at age 36.



No one will ever understand the exact pain I went though having m/c his child at 8 weeks just months before he died. No one will understand how when we asked him to be a known donor he said yes cause he wanted a little part of him out there and how I felt when I realized I had lied to him. How even when I told him I was pregnant I told him that I would probably m/c. How after his death I went to the funeral knowing there was a possibility I was pregnant right then and there with his child. How when my period came a week after his funeral I cant remember how i felt or even when it came. It’s too much pain and complicated for my mind to get around.
It’s still shaping me. The largest way it changed me though is a refuse to be scared. Everything major I do in my life I rethink if I am doing it out of fear.





He had nothing to do with it but the gift
I had a chance to lift
Instead
I said "don't get your hopes up this time"
I laugh at my ignorance now when I was hiding the double lines
It finds a way to my box of regrets
The biggest… and yet I keep trying
Finding a way to say "he would want it this way"
Happiness is hidden somewhere in this lie
His sighs, confusion saying "do we try again this time"
I had a chance to lift
Instead
I lied and said there was another







I sometimes think what it would be like to have his child now. What color hair would he/she have would he/she be a comfort when I am missing my friend. After all is said and done I have to believe there is a larger plan. That all along we where meant to have Caleb and that our donor is in heaven and knows that as well. I have a strong calling to Caleb wherever he is. I already feel the connection. And I never let myself wonder if it was supposed to happen any other way.





We own nothing
Nothing is ours
Not even love so fierce it burns like baby stars
But this poverty is our greatest gift
The weightlessness of us as things around begin to shift


Remember everything I told you
Keep it in your heart like a stone
And when the winds have blown things round and back again
What was once your pain will be your home

Everything in its own time
Everything in its own time

-C

Ethiopia

Wanted to share a little bit about Ethiopia. You can already see the flag and the weather *looks to the right* but I wanted to share a little more.

Population (2006 est.): 77 million.
Annual growth rate: 2.7%.
Ethnic groups (est.): Oromo 40%, Amhara 25%, Tigre 7%, Somali 6%, Sidama 9%, Gurage 2%, Wolaita 4%, Afar 4%, other nationalities 3%.
Religions (est.): Ethiopian Orthodox Christian 40%, Sunni Muslim 45-50%, Protestant 5%, remainder indigenous beliefs.
Languages: Amharic (official), Tigrinya, Arabic, Guaragigna, Oromigna, English, Somali.
Education: Years compulsory--none. Attendance (elementary) 57%. Literacy--43%.
Health: Infant mortality rate--93/1,000 live births.
Work force: Agriculture--80%. Industry and commerce--20%.

A country situated in the Horn of Africa. It is the 2nd-most populous nation in Africa.

Ethiopia is the oldest independent country in Africa, and the second-oldest official Christian nation in the world after Armenia. Ethiopia is the world's 27th-largest country.

Within Ethiopia is a massive highland complex of mountains and dissected plateaus divided by the Great Rift Valley, which runs generally southwest to northeast and is surrounded by lowlands, steppes, or semi-desert. The great diversity of terrain determines wide variations in climate, soils, natural vegetation, and settlement patterns.

Ethiopia has historically had one of the best economies in the world, which had continued on during reign of Haile Selassie, during which the value of the Ethiopian dollar was very high. Ethiopia was on the verge of being a prosperous nation. However, after the 1974 revolution, the economy of Ethiopia was run as a socialist economy: strong state controls were implemented, and a large part of the economy was transferred to the public sector, including most modern industry and large-scale commercial agriculture, all agricultural land and urban rental property, and all financial institutions. Since mid-1991, the economy has evolved toward a decentralized, market-oriented economy, emphasizing individual initiative, designed to reverse a decade of economic decline.

-C

Doh!

Ok, so I didn't have the comments for annonymous enabled, but now it is! You do not have to be a member of Blogger to comment :) Sorry about that, still new to the site
-S

Decoding my last blog

I just realized for 99% of the population my last post must seem like gibberish.

Here is the TTC (trying to conceive) abbreviations.

Have fun decoding my last blog :-)

IUI ... Intra-uterine Insemination

ICI ... Intra-cervical Insemination

AI…artificial insemination

HCG... Human Chorionic Gonadotropin

MC ...Miscarriage

Chemical pregnancy… Early miscarriage


TTC ... Trying to Conceive


BFN..Negative pregnancy test


BFP... Positive pregnancy test


OPK ... Ovulation Predictor Kit


DPO .... Days past ovulation

-C

Why adoption why Ethiopia??

We started adoption after 11 cycles ttc.

TTC went like this for us:

#1 IUI with unknown donor NW599 12 hours after + OPK. BFP 13dpo with FRER started bleeding chemical pregnancy.

#2 IUI with unknown donor NW300 12,24,36 after +OPK bfn.

#3 IUI unknown donor NW300 12,24,36 after + OPK tried preseed bfn.

#4 ICI known donor day of + OPK with instead cup. BFP 16dpo started bleeding right away but did not miscarry till 8 weeks.

#5 IUI with unknown donor NW599 24 after + OPK clomid 50mg 5-9 bfn.

#6 ICI known donor bfn.

#7 ICI known donor bfn

#8 ICI known donor bfn

#9 Doctor assisted IUI unknown donor Xytex 24,48 hours after HCG shot clomid 50mg 4-8 two good eggs bfn.

#10 Doctor assisted IUI unknown donor NW3375 17 hours after HCG shot clomid 100mg 5-9 one good egg. BFP 10dpo started bleeding chemical.

#11 IUI with unknown donor NW025 17 and 36 hours after + OPK 50mg clomid 4-8 and preseed. BFP 14dpo started bleeding chemical pregnancy.

So you can see why we moved to adoption. Honest to god we wanted to adopt from the get go but thought I would get prego right away and ttc would be cheaper. Then after we started the obsession to get pregnant took over me. Pregnancy tests became my drug of choice. I am so happy I got off the sauce of peeing in cups LOL

We actually get asked why Ethiopia all the time.

The transracial books I have read said the best answer to that question is “why not Ethiopia” The truth is it started off by process of elimination. 1^st where can a single women adopt 2^nd cost 3^rd age of child. By time we where done with all that we where left with Ethiopia. Don’t get me wrong we have felt called to help Africa for a long time. By donating money, time and food. We didn’t know our calling to help would lead us to adopt as well. As every step of the adoption goes and with everything new I learn about Ethiopia I know we made the right choice! Except for the food!! It made me so sick LOL. I have a feeling I might lose 10 pounds on our trip to Ethiopia. Which is fine by me.

-C

Blog's Up!

We are Sari and Courtney we are excited to start our blog about adopting from Ethiopia!!
To get you all up to date we have:

Finished our part of the homestudy (still waiting for dfcs to come back)
Sent the I600A (still waiting for that to come back)
Fingerprint appointment with the FBI 10/19/06
Sent in application to the adoption agency (will be off waitlist at the end of October)
Got the adoption loan

Thats it for now we are going to post more information about ourselves separtely later this week.

S&C